Get all 12 Lauren Fairweather releases available on Bandcamp and save 20%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Peaches and Plums, The Magicians Sessions, With You, Whatever Happens, Do What You Love, Lost and Found, Math, Home, I'm Still Waiting (For My Pottermore Email), and 4 more.
1. |
Escape
03:59
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This desk saved my life
This is where they were written
The words that kept me alive
My brain breaks sometimes
Then I find myself reaching
For those familiar spines
When I get lost inside the pages
I just feel all of my pain melting away
At least for the day
Chorus
I just need a good fantasy
To help me cope with this agony
Take me out of this moment
And let the magic carry me
So even when my heart aches
And I’m not in the best shape
I can reach for a well-worn book
To give me an escape
Will this time be my downfall?
Feeling like I’ll be crushed
Under the weight of it all
But somehow, you got through
To a world that was waiting
For someone just like you
I can’t wait to get to the good part
You gave me hope that it gets brighter ‘round the bend
If I hold on ‘til the end
Chorus
When you grow up
You don’t have to give up
What you loved when you were younger
Chorus
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2. |
Not Gonna Say
03:49
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I just met this guy, he’s kinda shy
Asked me
“Where the hell am I”
You’re upstate and you’re late
You’re not hallucinating
“Great”
Follow me, find a seat
And don’t you dare flunk out on me
Hey, you’re kind of strange, look at that name
Here’s another costume change
Oh hell yes, you passed the test
Now come along and see the rest
I can’t be sure, but I think you’re
The interruption I’ve been waiting for
I can’t stop my eyes from wandering
When you walk into a room
Can you tell I’ve got a painful crush on you?
But I’m not gonna say
Cause my heart is gonna break
Not gonna say
Cause you’d say no anyway
But I could swear
There’s something there
Except you’re probably straight
I might be falling for you
But I’m not gonna say
Q, you’re pretty cute, shaking in your boots
I wanna get you in your birthday suit
You get this look and I am hooked
When you talk about those books
So I flirt. It couldn’t hurt
I can’t resist an introvert
Huh. You caused a fuss, come home with us
You didn’t tell me you were dangerous
You’ve been expelled, and I can tell
That you’re not taking it so well
You share your past, and I bond fast
I put my darkest secret on blast
Then I offered to seduce you
In case that memory would suffice
And you thanked me after you said “that sounds nice”
But I’m not gonna say
Cause my heart is gonna break
Not gonna say
Cause you’d say no anyway
I hope you know
You’re not alone
Some magic comes from pain
I think I’m falling for you
But I’m not gonna say
Guess it all turned out okay cause
You found us grilling in the rain
And the face you made when I called out your name
I’m not gonna say
That I thought of you all day
Not gonna say
That I’d hoped you’d get to stay
I know you’ll mean
A lot to me
Until we’re old and gray
I’m so damn into you
But I’m not gonna say
I’m just enjoying the view
But I’m not gonna say
Yeah I’m still falling for you
But I’m not gonna say
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3. |
You Can't Hurt Me
04:45
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Yeah, I finally figured out
How you erased and tossed me out
And you couldn’t make me forget
You haven’t seen the last of me yet
I’m done waiting
I am shaking
Won’t go back to who I was
I’m heading out
Can’t wear me down
You will regret you gave me up
Leave and desert me
You can’t hurt me
You can’t hurt me
Your words go right through me
You can’t hurt me
You can’t hurt me
I’m burning, burning I’m burning
But I’m learning, learning, I’m learning
Don’t try to find me
You can’t have me
You can’t hurt me anymore
Cracked their puzzles easily
Then magic came looking for me
Flashing lights and tattooed stars
And goddesses erasing scars
Now I’ve made it
The freight train is
Coming, this was a mistake
Wanted to belong
Not just to be strong
And then it you took it all away
Leave and desert me
You can’t hurt me
You can’t hurt me
Your words go right through me
You can’t hurt me
You can’t hurt me
I’m burning, burning I’m burning
But I’m learning, learning, I’m learning
Don’t try to save me
You can’t help me
You can’t hurt me anymore
When we were underground
I finally let go
I’ve been stuck in between
For so damn long
The fear is gone
The anger’s gone
The pain is finally gone
Leave and desert me
You can’t hurt me
You can’t hurt me
Your words go right through me
You can’t hurt me
You can’t hurt me
I’m glowing, glowing, I’m glowing
Now I’m growing, growing, I’m growing
You know where to find me
If you need me
You can’t hurt me anymore
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4. |
Niffin
04:57
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When it was over
I dove down deep into the earth
I liked it down there after
I left behind all of the hurt
Flew into space and
I jostled stars on my way up
Nothing could take me down
So I spent a week inside the sun
You know how good I used to be
So worried what people thought of me
But way out there
I could just be
Chorus:
When I turned blue I laughed, I got the joke at last
And it’ll never stop being funny
Why’d you bring me back, won’t you change me back
Did you think I’d be grateful, honey
Cause you took away the power I had
You could never even fathom all the power I had
Oh wuh uh oh, wish I could go
Back to being a niffin
I slid backwards in time
Saw how the world began
I made beautiful magic
That you will never understand
I’d fly for days
And never feel worn out or bored
I still have so much of the
Universe left to explore
Want you to know what you took from me
Billions of wonders I’ll never see
I’m begging you to set me free
Chorus
At least I’ve got bacon, is that enough
Took a hot bath, but is that enough
Guess I’ll have sex, was that enough
I’ll need some more, just to make real sure
Put on fresh socks, is that enough
Had a real big sneeze, was that enough
Now I’ve had chocolate, and that’s enough
You wore me down, guess I’ll stick around
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5. |
Proof of Concept
03:33
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We wake up every day
And we make art
Capture the beauty of life
Then we take it apart
And I don’t know
If it’s a spell that you’re casting
But you’re so hot
That it is kind of distracting
And I’m pretty sure
That I want a whole lot more
Than what I came here looking for
I just had to kiss you
I couldn’t hide it anymore
Cause the way you’re looking at me
Makes me fall flat on the floor
I’m overthinking
But I have to follow through
Cause I’m glad we’re here together
And I want to be with you
Decades went by
We built a wonderful life
I watched you become a dad
I buried you when you died
Did that happen
Cause it’s all coming back
In a matter of seconds
There’s so much to unpack here
But all I know
As we sit in the afterglow
Is that I’d give it another go
I just had to tell you
I couldn’t hide it anymore
The years we had were beautiful
And I want fifty more
We became a family
El, I think we always were
Who gets that proof of concept
Just say yes and I’ll be yours
I thought I’d lost you
I thought that you were gone for good
Then you said we had proof of concept
Like I’d always hoped you would
And I’m not sure if that
Means you love me, but I know
That I can’t live without you
Even if I’m just friends with you
And El, even if it kills me
I will fight to bring you home
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6. |
Braver
05:15
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I am trapped in my memories
Reliving my deepest regret
Then it finally hit me
The one that I tried to forget
When someone good and true loved me
And he went out on a limb
I pretended it didn’t matter
Snuffed it right out and watched it break him
The truth is I was afraid
And when I am afraid I run away
So I ran away
Cause you are more
Than I felt like I deserved
Wish I had been braver
Why couldn’t I be braver
And if I get
One more chance to tell you how I feel
Next time I’ll be braver
You taught me to be braver
Did you know that I loved you
That day we first laid out the tiles
All the peaches and plums we could eat
No signs of danger for miles
In a whole other lifetime
We grew old, had a family at that
You and me, we worked for 50 years
Who gets proof of concept like that
I hate that I was afraid
But now I finally have the guts to say
I’d choose you any day
Cause you are all
I could ever want and more
Wish I had been braver
Why couldn’t I be braver
And if I get
One more chance to tell you how I feel
Next time I’ll be braver
You taught me to be braver
If I ever get out of here, Q
Know that when I’m braver
It’s cause I learned it from you
x4
Cause you are more than I felt like I deserved
Wish I had been braver
Why couldn’t I be braver
And if I get one more chance to tell you how I feel
Next time I’ll be braver
You taught me to be braver
Cause you are all I could ever want and more
Wish I had been braver
Why couldn’t I be braver
And if I get one more chance to tell you how I feel
Next time I’ll be braver
You taught me to be braver
If I ever get out of here, Q
Know that when I’m braver
It’s cause I learned it from you
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7. |
Hard, Glossy Armor
03:14
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My Dad taught me
I could be anything when I was a kid
But be loud or pissed off
And the world shot back
“Who does she think she is”
He saw what he raised
A woman he could no longer control
Who didn’t seek approval
Nothing deadlier to the fragile male ego
Put my hard, glossy armor on
Step back
I’ve got my hard, glossy armor on
Chorus:
I’m not a goddamn princess
I’m a king and no less
King of I can’t do this
High King of He Was Right
King of manipulation
King who ruins everything
King of pointless rage
Who’s not giving up this fight
I’m angry every second
My eyes are open cause I’m forced to see
That I know who I am
And I’m not what I am pretending to be
I always hit first
And if they hit back they learn I can’t be touched
Under all this armor
I’m here wondering why does it hurt so much
With my hard glossy armor on
Step back,
I’ve got my hard glossy armor on
Chorus
Here goes, I’ve got my hard glossy armor on
Step back, I’ve got my hard glossy armor on
Yeah I’ve still got my hard glossy armor on
Watch out, I’ve got my hard glossy armor on
I’m not a goddamn princess
I’m a king and no less
King of I can do this
High King of step aside
King of befriending demons
King of getting shit done
King of hitting home runs
I’m gonna be just fine
King of forging axes
King of kicking asses
King’s collecting taxes
Back off, you’ve crossed the line
King of helping women
King of breaking your plans
I’m taking you down
And I’m taking back what is mine
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Lauren Fairweather Rhode Island
Acoustic indie songs about books, TV shows, and other fandom love.
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